Two Years Ago...

I haven't had a whole lot of time to reflect on the fact that I'm done. My days have been happily filled with friends, phone time, more friend time and the inevitable fro-yo+cupcake trips. Maybe I'm still slightly avoiding the big girl world that awaits me as soon as I walk across the stage tomorrow. Will I feel different after I walk across the stage? probably not. But I do think it's important to acknowledge how I got here.

So a few years ago, I got it in my head that I wanted to go to grad school- for journalism. If you know anything about me- you know that once I have my mind set- I do it, and it's really hard to deter me (you can thank my stubborn dad for that one). It was one of those things- that if I don't do it- I'll probably always regret it. If I didn't do it- it would have turned into one of those nagging thoughts in my mind that won't ever leave me alone. So I did it. I believe that everyone has their own path- sometimes we don't know why we take the direction that we do- in fact, most of the time, we stumble blindly along- yet fully aware that there is a higher being guiding us along. We trust and we let ourselves be guided.

I am also a big believer in doing things that challenge myself. I knew I had to go to grad school- I wanted to- and I did- and I learned SO much. Yes, there were people I encountered along the way who told me I didn't need to go, that I should have jumped right into the workforce. I wavered on my decision sometimes- I second guessed myself, but ultimately, I knew deep down that this is what I had to do. And I don't regret it, and I know more and am smarter because of it. Yes, it was hard work that didn't come without its fair share of character building along the way. But I did it- I did it for myself-and I am proud of that. So please, ignore the people in your lives who might tell you "can't" or "you shouldn't." No- you SHOULD and you CAN do whatever it is you want and you know deep down you need to do.

When I graduated from Baylor in 2008, one of my favorite Spanish professors, Dr. Larson, wrote a facebook note to all of his students. I saved it- and I reflect on it often. It is a reminder of things I have accomplished and things I have yet to learn. Here it is:

We celebrated graduation at Baylor yesterday. I was doing my usual marshalling, and it was my job to put our Masters students in the right order. They were all angels. This was a tough graduation for me because I really like this bunch of graduates. I have worked with many of them since they were freshman, and it's hard to see them go. It's natural that it is now time to move on, but many of them have become my friends, and now they are gone. This is the normal process of life: the children grow up, mature, and move on. This is the way things have been since the beginning of time, but it doesn't make it any easier. I will still miss them. I wish them all the best. I know I can't protect them from the hurts of the world: the broken hearts, the broken bones, the worries, the disappointments, the broken dreams, fear, envy, shame. My focus has always been, however, to give them art and something they can take with them so that when the bad things happen, they can always look back and have a memory, a poem, a story that might help assuage whatever is troubling them. I taught them Spanish, but I hope I also taught them to think. Maybe life will be a little easier if they can do that. Good bye, so long, and farewell but remember that the door is always open. Here's to seeing you back here again soon sometime...
Salinas says it so much better:

Perdóname por ir así buscándote
tan torpemente, dentro
de ti.
Perdóname el dolor alguna vez.
Es que quiero sacar
de ti tu mejor tú.
Ese que no te viste y que yo veo,
nadador por tu fondo, preciosísimo.
Y cogerlo
y tenerlo yo en lo alto como tiene
el árbol la luz última
que le ha encontrado al sol.
Y entonces tú
en su busca vendrías, a lo alto.
Para llegar a él
subida sobre ti, como te quiero,
tocando ya tan sólo a tu pasado
con las puntas rosadas de tus pies,
en tensión todo el cuerpo, ya ascendiendo
de ti a ti misma.
Y que a mi amor entonces le conteste
la nueva criatura que tú eres.

Pedro Salinas

Every Girl Needs a Gay

and today.... I'm going to get my nails done and go shopping with my gay bestie. Love it. This is my dream come true. Pics to come later!!!!

Hairspray has Multiple Uses

Because this is my blog- it is important to acknowledge everything that happens- even when some of those occurrences make the aforementioned blogger seem less-than glamorous....

That being said- I will tell you about my less-than shining moment that happened to me last weekend.

Ryan called me early- and lured me out of my deep sleep with the promise- that if I got ready and went over to his house, that we could get cinnamon rolls- the good kind. You don't have to ask me twice. I practically jumped out of bed- sadly, the fastest I've probably gotten up in a long time (but that is another issue).

So, I blindly stumbled over to my coffee machine- and then proceed to go back to my room to put my contacts in. Once I finally had my cup of coffee in my hand- and my first couple of sips- I was ready to face the world.... and my new little visitor in my living room.

I went over to open my blinds in my living room- and noticed this "thing" in the corner. Upon closer inspection, it turned out to be .... wait for it.... a cockroach... oh balls. Now, before I finish my story- I know what you're thinking. Kira- it's just a little cockroach- no big. NO- it was a BIG mother effer. We are talking about as long as my pinky. Sick.

So... what do I do, what do I do? Well, I had a minor freakout. I stood there- supervising the thing, to make sure it didn't hop up and run somewhere where I couldn't find it. That would be WORST case scenario. I had to think of an action plan- FAST.

So I did what I normally do when I need help with my life- and called boyfriend. The convo went like this:
ME: Boyfriend- I have a cockroach in my living room.
RYAN: So
ME: SO????? (cockroach starts spinning around on its back) *scream*
RYAN: *rolls his eyes*
ME: What do I do????
RYAN: Kill it...

Okay- this is where I have a problem. In his brain.... the quick fix is obviously killing the dumb thing. But: THAT.IS.SICK. It was big. I just couldn't bring myself to step on it and have its guts spew all over my floor. I get the creeps just thinking about it.

So with Ryan's voice streaming over the phone to just "Kill the thing," I grab every girl's secret weapon: Hairspray. Now, I know this might seem strange- oh no... It's been proven. This stuff works for everything- for both beautification- and bug killing.

Armed with my hairspray (I pulled out the big guns and used used my Big Sexy Hair kind) I ran into my closet, put on some tennis shoes, stuck paper towels to the bottom of them- and returned back to my living room to face my arch-nemesis.

I hairsprayed him like a pro. He had no chance-lets be honest. There was a moment when I thought my defense was wavering. I sprayed him and he started spinning around on his back- I thought he was going to attack me. Nope- I wasn't going to let that happen. After I doused him with a good amount of hairspray (he wasn't moving anywhere after that), it was time to step on him. Gross. So, with the paper
towels stuck to the bottom of my shoe- I plugged my ears, closed my eyes- and went for it.

Kira 1, roach 0.

Lately...

I've been neglecting my blog- I know, and I'm sorry. I thought I'd have all of this free time post-finishing classes+master's reports+projects, but my calendar has been full. But this time- it's full of the fun stuff- aka- I've been catching up with friends I have been neglecting because of school. And get this: IT.FEELS.GREAT!!!

There is something so liberating about going to have a drink with some friends and not have a million "to-do's" running through my head. For the first time in a long time- I am free-maybe not for long- but I sure am enjoying it while it lasts.

I am a free woman and it feels fabulous. I even got a little crazy this week- and went to happy hour like every day.... because I could. ;) And it was worth it....

Here are some photos of some of my fun:

Brunch with the girls

Post-brunch self portrait

Me and Reshma at Oasis before everyone else showed up

Finish Line

Tomorrow is my last day of school- ever (well for now at least), and I feel so strange. I have some great things I need to write about soon- I've bee finishing up the master's report and a paper I have due tomorrow as well as a presentation. Once I'm done with that- I can spare some time tomorrow to share with you the great things from this week. For now- I'm sharing this song with you- "Still" by Tim McGraw. Love it. "When this road gets crazy/ And tries to break me/ I've had all I can stand/ I can close my eyes no matter where I am/ And just be still"

Annnnnnd we're done....

Turned in my master's report about ten minutes ago- and I feel like this:

Happy Cinco de Mayo

Because I'm a grad student- read: trying like crazy to finish my master's report, I'll be partaking in Cinco de Mayo in my hot pink Mexican dress which I love oh so much.... and drinking a cerveza while I finish my final edits....

I can celebrate cinco another day.... maybe on the ocho...

Honorary past cinco pics to come later.